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The Spirituality of Gender

Male and Female According to Chassidus

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The Spirituality of Gender: Male and Female According to Chassidus

The different spiritual make-up of men and women illuminates their respective roles in a healthy relationship.

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Topics:	Shalom Bayit (Marital Harmony), Marriage, Relationships, Men & Women

By Shais Taub

Rabbi Shais Taub is a noted speaker, author, and columnist, who serves as scholar-in-residence of Chabad of the Five Towns. His talks and classes may be seen on SoulWords.org.

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5 Comments

Anonymous November 22, 2019

I don't know how it's possible to be true what you say at 20:50, "A man who has not anchor, no home to go to isn't a man. He's doing without any being."
If one is alive, they're busy being. They can also be doing, but just by being alive, they are being.
And, if God wants a man to remain single for life, which is the case when that happens, how can you say he's only capable of doing, but not of being just because he has no wife at his home?
Immediately after this you say another thing I don't understand. Whatever a man thinks of marriage is what he thinks of spirituality. Even if the only reflection of a man's appreciation of spirituality is how he perceives his marriage, what about a marriage where the woman doesn't want to be married to the man, but stays, as does the man who also doesn't want to be married to the woman, because of the great financial & other difficulties associated with divorce? Is the spirituality in this case being positive about being married singles? Reply

Yael London December 12, 2019

in response to Anonymous:

I think the meaning is that a man's priority is to find, a wife, does not necessarily mean every man will definitely find a wife, but that this should be his focus, before anything else, everything is should come secondary to that, from what I understand, the Torah Itself says a man should leave his father and mother and find a wife, I take that to mean, even if he has to leave everything he knows, [job, country,
etc] behind in order to find a wife that is what he should do, Reply

Simcha Bart for Chabad.org December 30, 2019

in response to Anonymous:

At minute 8:00 he explains about "being" - it doesn't mean just existing, just like Shabbat is not just about not doing work - it is about an "inner" state of being.

G-d doesn't want a person to remain single, it is a choice. Every soul has two parts, the masculine and the feminine part, and they were divided upon birth - and man needs to find his other half.

I am not sure about your last question. All he is saying is that if you think marriage as an institution is difficult, then that means your attitude to spirituality is that it is difficult. Reply

Moishe December 13, 2019

in response to Yael:

Thanks, but this doesn't answer my questions.
Also, Rashi says the plain meaning of leaving parents is God teaching the world to not have immoral relations.
And, men should cleave to wives & be unified via a child.
In Bereishis 3:16 He tells women that they will have a desire for their husbands, but not initiate things in a way that may be distasteful to their husbands,
ואל אישך תשוקתך. לְתַשְׁמִישׁ, וְאַעַפִּ"כֵּ אֵין לָךְ מֵצַח לְתָבְעוֹ בַּפֶּה, אֶלָּא הוּא יִמְשָׁל בָּךְ, הַכֹּל מִמֶּנּוּ וְלֹא מִמֵּךְ"
ואל אישך תשוקתך and to your husband will be your desire — for sexual relations. And, nonetheless, you will not have the temerity to proposition him with [your] mouth, but rather he will rule over you — everything will come from him and not from you.
תשוקתך. תַּאֲוָתֵךְ, כְּמוֹ נֶפֶשׁ שׁוֹקֵקָה (ישעיהו כ"ט):
תשוקתך thy desire — Similar to (Isaiah 29:8), ונפשו שוקקה “and his soul hath appetite”, (desires) Reply

gaga October 18, 2016

brilliant! Reply

The Spirituality of Gender: Male and Female According to Chassidus

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